The circumstances surrounding my birth are cloudy; there was no camera, no video. I didn’t think to bring a notebook, so the details are fuzzy, to say the least. The only evidence that it happened at all is my presence in this world, and a little piece of official-looking paper. Oh, and a handful of witnesses, including Mom and Dad.
This all happened 40 years ago today, in a hospital that is not yet named for me.
Since then, I’ve seen sights, done stuff, eaten things, collected far more friends than enemies, and worked at more jobs than most people twice my age. So far so good!
Forty carries some significance, I’m told. People have mistaken me for being 43 for the last 5 years, so I don’t think anything will change. I feel no different, and have never dreaded any turn of the calendar page. It’s amusing to me that I’m entering my 5th decade in life; I’ve never given aging a whole lot of thought, choosing to deal with stuff as it comes up. I met a non-surgically-modified 57 year old last week who could pass for 41, and I intend to copy her.
My most significant birthdays to date:
0, for Original. All the others depend on this one. I’m told it went smoothly, but I don’t remember a thing.
7: Mom put together a terrific back yard party with friends and activities. I remember it mostly because there’s film evidence. It was great, until I turned into a fantastic douche, throwing a tantrum because other kids were having more fun than I. Somehow, the party (and hopefully my personality) were saved from that burst of narcissism.
13: There was a sleepover party with 5 friends, which featured TPing one kid’s house, a light-smashing and tooth-removing pillow fight, staying up all night hopped up on Orange Crush and Cheetos, and a nasty Tobasco and shaving cream potion for the poor schmuck who fell asleep first. The next day, there was a parking lot amusement park that we visited, and I can tell you spinny rides do not mix well with that diet and sleep deprivation.
16: I was standing in line at the Secretary of State the moment they opened to collect my License to Freedom. I think there was cake too, but it was far behind being able to drive (legally, anyway).
18: Old enough to vote and be drafted.
21 was a bit odd, there was no drinking binge (friends and family of the time were teetotalers) and no big event that I recall. Had just returned from a honeymoon at that point, found out there was a youngster on the way, begun house shopping, and was earning $5.50 per hour.
All my adult birthdays have been spent pretty quietly with family and friends, and all but one have been a great time. I’ve never put a whole lot of big-dealedness into it, and enjoy whatever comes.
Since letting the weeds grow at the ol’ site, I’ve gotten out of the writing habit. I still count my online friends to be some of the best, most genuine and caring folks around, and appreciate the birfday wishes! Thank you!
Thanks also Tiff, Ron, & Mojo for ramping up the party!
Tell me your best birthday story, wouldja? Birthday suit optional.
May 8, 2009 at 12:47 pm
Woohoo! It worked! It worked! Spiffytown LIIIIIVVVVVEESSSSS!
May 8, 2009 at 1:07 pm
Okay now that’s outta my system… best birthday story. Hmm.
I remember very little of my actual childhood birthdays. Actually I remember very little of my childhood in general until probably 15 or 16. And we all know 15 sucks. 16? No. 16 + 1 week, yes, but not the actual day. 18? Well… it rained and I had to work. But back in the dark ages, there were certain imbibeables that one could legally purchase at 18, so it was kind of a biggie. 21? You’d think that would’ve been a bigger deal than it was, but since my drug of choice was of the barley and hops variety (which I could already partake of) not so much. Besides, at that point I was already working on wife #1 which pretty well put a damper on all things celebratory. So propagate that factor from 21 through 31. 32? Not as bad. Got a surprise party for two outta the deal from She Who Would Be Wife #2 and no, no details will be forthcoming. 33…34…35…36… not hitting any real winners here either. 38 was okay. Big surprise party complete with “Burma Shave” style signage all over the neighborhood. Huge tubs of frosty malt beverages… hard to recall who was there though. 39? I was unemployed with a mortgage and a houseful o’ progeny. Not a fun time. 40? Leave off the fact that my dad was dying and I guess it was okay. mmm… 41…. 42… well, at 42 the Canes were in the playoffs and on their way to their first Conference championship. I think we were playing Montreal at the time, but I don’t recall if there was a game on my birthday or not. I know there was on Mothers Day, ’cause I went to that one. Just not with my mom. 43… 44… 45… 46. Ah! 46. Canes back in the playoffs on their way to their first Stanley Cup. Seems like we were playing Montreal again… or maybe New Jersey. It always falls in that gray area between the first two rounds, so I have to go back and look. But since Game 2 of that series was on Mothers Day (and I did take my mom this time) then it was probably Montreal since we went to 6 games with them in Round 1. 47…48…49 Well 49 has the Canes back in the playoffs again and Cam Ward just off a 3-0 shutout of da Broons up in Bahstahn, so I guess that’s a good memory. And as my 49th cycle came to a close I was sitting in a parking lot at RDU Int’l with a dear sweet RL friend of mine waiting for the team charter to touch down so that we could yell and wave to the players as they departed.
So as Big Deals go, I haven’t had a birthday that really qualifies and I’m fine with that. Not that I object to being the center of attention or anything, but if that’s gonna happen, I’d rather it was for something noteworthy I did besides continue to convert O2 to CO2 for another year.
All of which means I like other people’s birthdays a lot more than my own.
May 8, 2009 at 1:13 pm
This past birthday I got drunk and humped a pig statue in front of my favorite restaurant. Yeah, i am a good time!
Happy Birthday! Don’t be a stranger.
May 8, 2009 at 1:34 pm
Well this wasnt my birthday, but it was somebodies and I had a great time. I dressed up like a pig statue and stood outside this restaruant minding my own business. Then all of a sudden this woman ran over and just started humping all over me. It was a grand old time. Happy Birthday!!
May 8, 2009 at 1:42 pm
I don’t really have any cool birthday stories, but almost everyone I know has had a birthday, so it’s pretty cool running into another person like that on these here internets. Small world.
A very Happy Birthday to you today, and please send my regards to your parents for doing it just over 40 years ago today!
May 8, 2009 at 1:49 pm
Hippy Bertday >=)
My birthdays are always disasters, so I try to hide on them. A tree fell on my house on my 30th. I expect to be hit by a meteor when I turn 40 next week.
May 8, 2009 at 2:00 pm
Oh BTW, now that you’re officially off the market and all, ya think you could hook me up with that non-surgically altered 57-year-old? I mean, if there was somethin’ happening there I wouldn’t ask, but being as you’re all in a newlywedly way and such, I figure you got your hands full already. So I thought I’d take care of the light work for ya.
I’m good that way.
May 8, 2009 at 3:19 pm
BMB: Thanks for stopping by!
Ron: I do believe you owe me a new laptop for that, seein’s how I sprayed Diet Coke all over this one. Fizzy.
Tim: Thanks, I’ll pass your regards along!
Grant: Here’s hoping it gives you special powers.
Moj’: My NSA57YOF, a remodeling customer of mine, is the already-married type. Sorry to break bad news! The Porn Couch Girl is back in the ‘hood though… She seems slightly less married.
May 8, 2009 at 5:05 pm
Hey you! Wow….40 is a milestone. My 40th was really low-key, but how could hubby beat the black balloons, tombstone cake, and black streamers he had for the surprise 30th he gave me? (We also got a speeding ticket on the way to the 30th – I guess he was running a little late.) Happy, happy and many more.
May 8, 2009 at 7:32 pm
If anybody starts that lordy lordy look who’s forty crap, they had better be talking about the bottle of Scotch they’re about to give you. If it’s a coffee mug, (don’t me ask how I know that that’s a possibility) you have the right to break it immediately. Resist the urge to brake it over their head.
Happy Birthday man!
My best birthday?…..50…and everyone, please…no snickering.
I had planned and trained (yeah, ya gotta train/ condition) to hike Grand Canyon. Down Bright Angle Trail (9.3 miles) to Phamton Ranch. Pitch my tent at Bright Angle Camp site and hike out the next day.
They have a men and women’s ‘bunk house’ down there that holds about 15 people each and it’s booked two years in advance, so I’m on the dirt. All’s well, stayed over-night on the south rim and hiked in in the morning. Fan-Flippin’-Tastic. Crossed the Colorado River foot bridge and headed to camp. Windy…windy!!!. Dusty. Hot (June 23). So I went straight to the ‘cantina’, they call it,(where they serve breakfast and dinner to the hikers…ordered in advance) because I decided I needed a birthday beer! I did not feel like setting up my one man tent right now. When I got my second beer I ask the young guy in charge if there by chance had been any cancelations in the bunk house, just taking a shot. He said YES!!!. I know that happens but the odds are very slim. He said it would be an extra…get this….$7.00. Sing “Happy Birthday to Me” about 100 times and you get my complete wonder. Slammed my second beer, picked up my backpack and within 10 minutes I was in out of the wind and dust, picked a bunk, and got ready to take a shower in an evaporative cooler, cooled bunk house. My hikers stew dinner would be served at 6, and my breakfast for my hike out was at 5am.
I kept asking, jokingly, if anyone wanted to buy my tent (expensive) and bedroll to help lighten my 30lb pack for the hike out.
I plan on going back when I’m 60 just to make sure the beer is as good as it was that day.
Didn’t mean to run on there… but you asked. This is your day. Thanks for having us join in.
All my best…-dave
May 9, 2009 at 9:33 pm
Mojo wrote more here than he ever does on his own blog!!
I hope you had the happiest of birfdays, Biff!! I’m so sorry that work exhaustion kept me from being there. I swear we’ll do it up right soon, if belatedly.
May 10, 2009 at 12:55 am
Ha! You’d not want to see my birthday suit. *shudder*
Happy Birthday, and congratulations on making it to 40. Maybe someday you’ll catch up to Tiff. I hope you had a great party!
May 10, 2009 at 8:46 pm
Happy Birthday
May 11, 2009 at 6:48 am
Happy Belated Birthday! My 40th (last April) was a good one. Hope you had a wonderful day!
May 21, 2009 at 12:19 pm
Happy belated Mr. Spiffola!