Last night I woke up after a somewhat solid sleep of 2 hours. It was 1:24 AM or thereabouts, and after some water input and output I lay down to sleep again. Problem was, sleep eluded me. I reviewed the previous work day, the coming work day, and other relational obligations. I settled which things would be done next. I came to the place of thinking about nothing, which usually works to put me to sleep. Not this time, oh no. I heard the gentle, rhythmically inconsistent clicking of the ceiling fan. I felt the sweat on my neck even in the cool night air. I heard the steady deep breathing of my slumbering bride, just inches from me. I was as alert as a deer.

I grabbed up my jammies, my blankie and pillow, and tried the couch. No napping there either, might as well turn on some teevee. I heard from the late Billy Mays about his awesome auger, watched an infomercial on a tool I’ve actually used and would like to own, and another fitness infomercial about confusing my muscles. Half an episode of Cops, half an episode of Airplanes of WW2, a smidgeon of Comedy Central and VH1 Classic, and finally I was getting sleepy – only 3 hours later. I turned off the equipment, snuggled in, and sunk into a deep dreamy sleep.

For about 12 minutes.

That’s when the dog across the street really had to let it be known that there was something to bark at, earnestly.

Dogs sure know how to ruin dreams.

I drifted off again, only to be chased by a jealous husband for a crime I did not commit. He just wanted to be mad at someone, and I was his target. It came to nothing but a dream full of intimidation and defensiveness, and I didn’t much like it.

I awoke at 5:00 to the gentle caress of one I love, who was asking if I was OK. Going back to bed, we snuggled in for another attempt at snoozeville. Suddenly, the alarm rang – time to go jogging?!? Oh hell no. I stayed in bed until the last possible minute, went to work, came home, ate dinner, worked some more, and wrote this post.

I hope tonight’s better.

How’d you sleep last night?